Arsenal’s presence and three other things from the Champions League draws

UEFA held the Champions League draw yesterday and teams like Real Madrid, Bayern Munich and Barcelona can now start fighting over who will score the most goals in the group stage. With Farmers football clubs like Maribor, Qarabag and Apoel expected to be glorified tourist, there are sprinkles of high profile games to ditch your bae for. Here are four things from the draws.

Arsenal are still in the Champions League 

Arsenal will be participating in the Champions League in an unofficial capacity this season. Though Arsenal fans have started taking language classes to learn Polish and can now say Éropo (which is Europa in Poland, but crowd/overload in Yoruba), the Gunners dominated much of the talk during the Champions League draws.

Social media was filled with all sorts of banter as Arsenal took another Champions League L despite not being in the competition.

We hope Arsene Wenger has been released after he was picked up by security personnel at the Champions League draws yesterday.




UEFA throw Manchester United and Liverpool a welcome back party

You will be forgiven if you thought Liverpool and Manchester United will be playing in the Europa League again this season because their groups look every bit like it.

Apart from Simi’s voice, there are few things softer than their group containing teams like Benfica, Basel and CSKA Moscow for United while Liverpool play Sevilla, Spartak Moscow and Maribor. This is a gift to both clubs from UEFA, unless something crazier than Kanye West happens, both team should qualify easily.


What kind of life did Diego Costa come?

It’s hard to explain who Diego Costa is but it is

even harder to comprehend the things he does. His current club Chelsea were drawn against his God chosen club Atletico Madrid and Costa won’t be a part of the game.

While still checking out bikinis in Brazil while his agent is breaking bottles in London, Costa has found himself nowhere and possibly jobless too.


Who did Tottenham offend? 

Whoever cursed Tottenham, did it with no clothes on. They were drawn in a group containing demolition boys Real Madrid, Bayern Munich’s practice team Borrusia Dortmund and free three points merchant Apoel, which is to compensate and ultimately ensure their journey into the Europa League is smoother where they should join up with their brothers, Arsenal.

As if the curse of playing in Wembley in Europe wasn’t enough, UEFA grouped them with teams who usually activate curses.